There are countless articles on how to best and easiest get started with breastfeeding, when children are best raised, how to get the perfect bedtime routine, and all sorts of other things.
But that's not what this blog post is about at all.
Instead, it's about something that is at least equally important: namely that you should remember to pamper yourself!
When you pamper yourself, you are neither selfish nor a bad mother. Because it’s all about remembering yourself so that you can be there for your child and your family.
Below you will find our 10 best tips on what you can do to remember to pamper yourself.
1) Try to let go of the guilt
Yes, we know. There’s a overflowing laundry basket over in the corner and you should do something about it, but the energy just isn’t there today. And that’s actually okay.
If you are on maternity leave, your body and mind are working hard right now because all the focus is on the needs of your baby. Instead of viewing maternity leave as a “stay-at-home vacation with baby cuddles,” you should see it as a full-time job. Your job and your brain are always at work – even at night. It drains your energy.
If you have small children, their needs still come first. After work, you have to pick up the kids, cook dinner, read bedtime stories, and all the other things that need to be taken care of.
Instead of beating yourself up when you don’t get to the dishes, cleaning, or all the other practical tasks you had planned BEFORE the baby arrived, rejoice in the things you actually accomplish.
2) See your friends – and talk about something other than baby
Keeping friendships alive is hard when you are a (new) mom. Almost all mothers can relate to that. But at the same time, it’s also one of the most important things. You were someone before you became a mother, and you still are.
Even though the little one can quickly fill all your thoughts, it’s important to find time for the old you and your friends as well. Of course, this doesn’t mean that all talk about your baby is completely excluded, but try to adjust it so that there is also focus on other things.
Besides your friends will love you for the attention, you will also feel the joy of talking to other adults about adult things.
3) Treat yourself to that really delicious piece of chocolate
Just imagine it. You open the package and take a piece of chocolate. You lean back, close your eyes, and take a bite. The sweet taste, with the slightly bitter aftertaste, plays with your taste buds, while your brain dances a joy dance and you feel the endorphins flowing through your body.
Of course, you should consider what you eat and your body needs a lot of good nutrients, but if you stay away from all the things you love, you will find that some of the joy also disappears.
Pamper yourself with the food you love the most – whether it’s chocolate, fruit, or something entirely different. We promise you that you will feel completely happy in your stomach – and in your heart
(If you are breastfeeding, remember that your baby cannot tolerate you eating all types of food.)
4) Take dad on a date – without the baby
When you become parents, your life will change forever. Suddenly, there needs to be room for one more person – not just in your heart or in your home, but also in your relationship. This automatically means less alone time together, including less time for dates and pampering.
But that doesn’t mean you automatically stop needing each other or needing time together. Therefore: invite dad on a date and have someone take care of the baby.
The date doesn’t need to be long or particularly elaborate. It could be a walk, a cup of coffee at the local café, a run, or anything else you used to do together. And all conversations about the baby are, of course, prohibited on the date – instead, talk about yourselves and each other. Or kiss – a lot and for a long time.
5) Be intimate – and remember to kiss!
Of course, it takes a little time before the body is completely ready for this, but you can easily start a little sneakily. Sex and intimacy – kisses, hugs, care – were probably a big part of your relationship before you threw yourselves into becoming parents. This is something you should hold on to because it strengthens your bond and ability to work together.
Furthermore, cuddling, kissing, hugging, giving each other massages, and having sex can have a positive effect on your mood and your energy. When you are intimate, you also affirm each other and make sure to check in and feel that the other is doing well.
Therefore: forget the bad excuses and find time to be naked with each other. If nothing else, just to lie close and talk about all the things you love about each other. Just like on the date, baby talk is banned because it’s about the two of you.
6) Give the baby to dad – and spend time on yourself
Just as you need alone time with your partner, you also need alone time with yourself. Can you remember the long baths, the workouts, or Sunday afternoons spent with a good book?
The need to be alone hasn’t changed, so make sure there is time for it every now and then – and make sure to spend that time on something other than laundry and chores. And if the bad conscience shows its ugly face? Then enjoy that while you stand in the shower and relax, dad is strengthening the bond with your child.
If you need a little more than a shower to relax, then book a massage, a haircut, a health treatment, or something completely different.
By setting aside time for yourself, you recharge your batteries and gain renewed energy. This makes life with the baby a little easier because you have a bit more surplus to draw from.
7) Allow yourself to sleep in once in a while
As your child gets a little older, it will be easier for dad to handle the morning routine, so you can catch up on some of the sleep that your body really needs. And even if you wake up early, enjoy lying completely still and savoring that you don’t have to rush out of bed.
If the morning routine is a bit hard to get to work without you, have dad bring the baby over to you and stay in bed while you nurse, if you’re comfortable with that. Afterwards, dad can take the baby again, and you can snuggle a bit more… just a little 5 minutes more.
By the way, you benefit from breastfeeding in different positions because your baby stimulates your body in various ways. This can help with milk production and is also the perfect excuse for you to just enjoy staying in bed 
8) Buy something nice for yourself – and forget all about shopping for the baby
Maybe you know it. The joy of putting on a new dress for the very first time and the smile that spreads when you look in the mirror. That dress that fits perfectly – and hides all the things you want to forget – and highlights all the things you want to show.
You still need that kind of clothing, even though you’ve become a mother. It’s still important to feel attractive and comfortable – even if your body now bulges a bit oddly or looks different than it did before.
It doesn’t even have to be clothing – if you’ve longed for a new gadget or something for the house, buy it and make sure to remind yourself that it was a gift especially for you. We believe there’s a guarantee of smiles for a long time afterwards =)
9) Put up the beautiful curtains and watch something cool on TV
The best part about this tip is that it can be done while you’re breastfeeding or with the kids.
Of course, the focus should be on your baby, so you have good contact and the baby feels secure. But! You will spend many hours breastfeeding, so you might as well use some of that time to do something that helps you relax.
If you have small children, watching TV with the kids may not always be relaxing. Instead, allow yourself to sit back and relax after the kids have been put to bed.
10) Share your sorrows and your joys
This advice might be the very best because it’s something many often forget: talk to other people about your problems, your sorrows, and your joys. You shouldn’t feel ashamed of being a bad mother just because you’re worried or because there’s something you’re struggling with.
You weren’t born a mother; it’s something you become along the way. It’s therefore something you need to practice and learn. And you do that best by sharing your thoughts with others.
It doesn’t necessarily have to be about problems related to being a mother. It can also be about your mental health in general. It’s hard to become a mother, so it’s important that you get all the support and help you need – but that help only comes if you allow it.
